My absolute highest purpose is joy. I know it with absolute certainty. It wasn’t always so.
If you asked me what my purpose in this life is, say, six months ago, I would not have had the answer. I might have said, wife, mother, sister, aunt, and friend and so on. I might have even added that I am in the business of creating homes for families, a noble profession that I take pride in. I might even have said nothing at all, because the truth is, I really did not know.
Now I know. I know it deep in my bones. I know it in my heart, in my cells, in my brain, in every part of my being. I know it because I know. And when I remember that I know, I shine, the whole world shines. My experience becomes a kaleidoscope of color and energy. Trees are a more beautiful shade of green. The sky is pure crystal blue. The sun shining on water takes my breath away. I feel the spark, the energy, the infinite possibilities of our world and our universe. It really is transforming. Quite spectacular. When I remember that I know, I smile and experience everything I just described and more. I am not exaggerating this.
As humans we have convinced ourselves that anything worth anything takes hard work. No pain, no gain. Right? We think we have to earn our rewards. Good things come to those who wait. For some strange reason we think beauty, good feelings, fun, happiness, abundance and well-being are the end result of struggle. We tend to make things incredibly hard on ourselves in the process. I used to subscribe to this belief with certainty. I just knew if I suffered enough, worked hard enough, struggled enough and was GOOD enough, for long enough, if I could SURVIVE intact, then I would get my rewards. A sure recipe for fear of lack and anxiety. Hoping that I would be young enough and well enough to enjoy the rewards if and when they came. Huh? What? It seems so, well, counterintuitive. Why struggle if you don’t have to? Why wait? Why not be happy now?
The truth is so simple and so easy that we reject it, over and over again. Despite evidence to the contrary we continue rejecting the answers. We are here to live, to love, to experience the beauty of this time and space. All day, every day, right now. We are here to literally be joy. It is our first and highest purpose. Joy is not something to be achieved. It is not a reward. More importantly, joy is not a feeling that can only be experienced if someone is treating you just right, or if the stars align perfectly. It is not meant to be something you feel only at certain intervals. It is not conditional on outside influences. Just take a few deep breathes and examine that for a moment. Just test out the possibility that each of us has the means, within ourselves, with no reliance on outside forces to create joy, choose joy and be joy.
As a meditation newbie I began with the yogic mantra “so hum”. It is not only a reflection of the sound of breath but also carries a contemplative meaning: “I am that”. In my newbie understanding it means identifying oneself with the universe or ultimate reality. This meditation mantra quieted my mind, separating myself from outside influences and put me on this path to understanding who I am and what my purpose here is. It created space for me to test out and realize that I create what I desire and that I desire joy. That no matter what is going on around me, chaos at work, in my life, my country and the world, I choose my experience with it. I choose what space to exist in. I choose my feelings. And, regardless of outside influence, I choose joy. Finally, liberation from fear, anxiety and stress is mine. I know this simply because it feels good. When I let my good feelings guide me, more good comes, in thought, in prayer, in love and in life. Good ideas, good opportunities, good people. My heart expands and I feel joy. So, yes, now I know and the knowing is good. I am secure in the knowledge that I can create my own experience, I can always choose and I am choosing joy. My absolute and highest priority is joy. My absolute and highest purpose is joy. So Hum Joy!
~Namaste my lovelies.