Let it go or Let it be
Let it go or let it be? I think the let it go memes are winning out on this one. Breathe in the good shit and breathe out the bad shit, you know, the “stuff”, the “it” that no longer serves us. Let it go! Let it all go to create space for something better or to feel better. In the current mindfulness tribe, there is definitely a notion that trusting again, healing isn’t possible unless we let go. So why is it such a thing? Why is it so hard? Why does letting go of something or someone get us so anxious. Why do we struggle with this specific part of our mindfulness practice and healing ? Why can’t we “just let it go”? Just thinking about letting “it” go produces anxiety. What is “it” anyway? Is there one “it” or many “its”? Must be many, hundreds maybe. Which “it” gets prioritized to let go first? Is there a virtual conveyor belt of “its”on their way up and out? Or, do we have to dig for some of them, dig deep, create some big holes, some scarring to get them hauled up and out of us? Maybe if we open up and are really good in our mindfulness practice all the “its” just go at once?
Let it go or let it be? This struggle is very real and its very possible that resistance to letting it go or, not really knowing what we are supposed to be letting go creates additional anxiety Our dismay at not being able to “let it go”, creates unease and in some cases dis-ease. A premise of positive thinking that creates a belief that if we just let stuff go we will be healed and feel better. This premise is actually flawed though for a couple of reasons. Whatever it is that we are trying desperately to let go of is a part of us. Like a limb. If a limb makes us feel bad, would it only feel better if we let the limb go? So the only way to heal is to expel it? To separate ourselves from what is essentially a part of us? At first, chopping off fingers or even arms might be difficult but survivable. Eventually though, we will get to parts that we can’t function without. Parts of us that are essential to survival. We will consider mutilation of our non-physical being essential to healing. Letting it go implies action. Action and effort, especially if it feels forced, or doesn’t come from inspiration can be counter-intuitive to the process of mindful living.
So here is another thought. Let it be. Just relax and let it be. We are human be-ings not human do-ings. Be-ing is kind of our thing. There are no mistakes so everything we have been through both good and bad is a part of us, an imprint, like a soul tattoo. Perhaps the work, the practice is about sitting with all that we are and shining a light on everything, equalizing every single part of us – understanding that everything, all the light places as well as all the dark places have an equal place of honor in who we are. It’s about opening all the doors and all the chambers that hold the secrets, the hurts, the broken promises, the victimization, the abuse, the self-loathing. Basically anything we perceive as a bad thing that needs to be eliminated or let go of. Yes, there is a time for setting the programs, patterns and emotions free, but I would propose that until we can see them all and see them all as equal and, accept and love them all as an essential part of who we are, that the letting go, is not possible. In other words, we can let go of the pain that getting the tattoo caused but the tattoo is part of who we are.
Let the waters settle and you will see the moon and the stars mirrored in your own being. Rumi
Let it go or let it be? Yes, let it be, let the waters settle. Spend some time with yourself before you jump to purging. See what is there, check out all the nooks and crannies. Instead of rejecting the sore spots as ugly, unworthy, unthinkable, unimaginable, morbid, unmentionable and distasteful, bring them to the light. Here is the hard part, accepting these sore spots without blame or bias. Just because you aren’t busy trying to cut them up or exorcise them, doesn’t imply that the behavior or the person who inflicted the hurt is blameless. You can observe and accept these places and equalize them to neutralize their power. If they are a part of you then by definition they are unique and lovely and beautiful. By accepting everything as equally a part of the beautiful and powerful creator that you are, you can love the imprint, each beautiful tattoo and then, let any paint surrounding the tattoo go. Just be with yourself a little first and the release is all the easier and sweeter.
I use memories but I will not allow memories to use me Deepak Chopra
Most of us are still finding our way between what was and what will be. Who we were, who we are and who we are becoming. Deepak Chopra teaches “it is in the process of letting go that you find yourself”. If you have been struggling with the idea of letting it go – try letting it be. Be with yourself, be with all the perfect imperfections, examine all your tattoos and accept. Move beyond who you were to who you are. Accept and love every single part of you and then, naturally and without any resistance begin to observe the feelings that surround those tattoos and send them back where they came from. Just let it be so you can let it go.